I’m sitting with my father in the circular solarium of the care center he has been living in.  He is in a talkative mood and full of stories to share today. I take after him when it comes to verbalization. I was born talking, am still talking, and now writing about what I talk about.  Add to that the fact that he is overjoyed to be able to hear again after 20 plus years of personally denying himself a hearing aide and you have all the earmarks of a “good” visit.   I had a feeling that I was going to come away with some spectacular stories about our family.  And I’m proud to say that I recorded his stories by microphone and video camera.

I can hear him telling my friend, Sue, about Winnie, The Walking Talking Doll he surprised me with for Christmas when I was five-years-old. The doll scared the crap out of me when it came slowly sliding toward me on roller skates, singing with no mouth moving.  If I was older, like in my teens, I could attribute it to being in an altered state, but, at five, I wasn’t quite that rebel just yet.  My mother called Winnie “Your Father’s Sacrifice Gift.”  You must have had one of those in your life at one time or another.  It’s the gift your parent had to trek insurmountable miles knee deep in a freak snowstorm, (the likes of which we have never seen), to buy a toy for his little tyke.   Naturally, by the time he arrived he was soaked through the bone, shivering and tired, only to be turned away by the owner of the store because they were closing!  The story takes on additional chapters each time its told.  I paid for every emotional moment that doll was in my life. Wait.  I’m obviously still paying for it because I’m mentioning it here, again.

CLICK HERE TO FOR INFO ON THIS VINTAGE DOLL

On Grandma's Porch with Pop 1955

“Winnie went to the doll hospital twice and then she was put away in the closet,” I could hear my father saying as I snap back to present time, my mental rant a nostalgic memory of a long ago past.

“…And she stayed in my closet until I got married and left the house when I was 21.”  I raised my hand to prevent Pop from finishing the story.  “ I don’t want to know what you did with her—.”

“Threw her out,” he triumphantly announces. “ Her, Debbie Reynolds! Tiny Tears, Barbie and Shirley Temple…in fact, the whole trunk…trashed.”

A silence fell over the solarium room of visitors, and my father realizes that he has said too much.  “They had matted hair and were missing parts,” he quickly explains.

But, it’s really too late.  Winnie, Debbie ,Tiny, Barbie and Shirley are in Dolly Heaven (not to be confused with Dollywood).

I shook my head and smiled. “Well, Pop, If they want to get a message to me, they know how to do it,”

This comment brought on a raised eyebrow and a chuckle, “That is surely one thing your grandmother couldn’t do!”

I love these visits with my father.  I guess you could say I’m #WINNI-NG!

(Pun intended)

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It’s one o’clock in the morning and I am tossing and turning while fighting the storm that has entered our atmosphere. With a storm comes lightning and thunder, a combination that stirs up energy, and that atmospheric pressure affects our own personal energy. Depending on the length of the storm, it can be hard not to ride it out by staying up all night, eyes wide open, body buzzing as the mind fights that desire to slowly flutter off to dreamland. It is this “fight” with one’s energy that causes us to toss and turn in insomnia.

Rather than toss and turn, I have always used these times as the perfect opportunity to be productive, and most times, I find myself writing about the things that are most important to me. That opportunity does not lend itself only to storms, but includes new moons, full moons, retrogrades, and even eclipses, that can contribute the same seemingly disruptive energy. It amazes me that someone would think that the moon can move large bodies of water to create tides, yet that it could not possibly affect the movement of a human body, which is almost 75% water! There is a reason why emotion and ocean rhyme. It’s to remind us our that lunar connection has an affect on our responses and we have to consider those responses as we move through our daily existence if we want to establish emotional balance.

People reacting through emotional outburst (and we all have those moments) have allowed themselves to be tempered by the vibrations around them. No matter what shakes you up, the fact remains that your energy is still shaken up, and it would behoove you to use that distraction to your advantage, rather than to toss and turn, literally losing sleep over it. Instead, use that energy to your advantage: journalize, color, read–do whatever you need to so that you expend that energy. If you are determined to get back to sleep, then put soft music in your player and tell yourself, by way of personal “suggestion,” that this will ease you to sleep.

My late uncle used to say that awareness is everything in life. So, in my best effort to help you become more aware via my study, trial and experience, I have uncovered ways that help me to not only go with the flow during these energetic times, but to direct the current for what lies ahead so that you are aware of the way your energy ebbs and flows. The easiest way to track your progress is to use a calendar and a journal. It doesn’t matter if you keep records on printed paper or if you use your computer. Let your instincts tell you what feels right for you. The idea is to use it faithfully so you have a heads up on the months ahead, so choose something user-friendly. Mark up your calendar with the dates of the moon cycle, retrogrades, eclipses, and anything you read about that would cause an energy shift in our skies (like comets, for instance). Ultimately, this tracking will help you avoid some of the more negative aspects that touch upon our energy. In this way you will be able to understand your own energy and how you, personally, work with the world.

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